Dear Lady of Substance,
I know a lot of ‘concerned’ people, men and women, ‘advise’ smart and intelligent single ladies to stupid down, sorry, to dumb down so they could find husbands. They tell them to hide their cars if they drive and to move out of their posh apartments into tenements (face-me-I-slap-you apartments) so men won’t feel intimidated. They counsel them to not bother to buy cars, if they don’t have already, nor furnish their apartments because men get easily intimidated by ladies of means.
I just want to let you know, my dear lady, that if you yield to such pieces of advice, you are the same as the sly and foxy guy who pretends to be all the things you want in a man so he could get you to marry him. It is called manipulation. You are being a weasel.
Dumbing down is wearing another’s personality. A man who wants that personality will be erroneously attracted to you and when he eventually realises you are not what you pretend to be, there will be clashes. Clashes because your true self is not of the same brand as his, clashes because it is birds of a feather that flock together.
So, why not stand tall and be you? You don’t need affectations to find your own type of man whose deep will automatically call out to yours without struggles. Do not settle. You deserve the best.
Ayobami Temitope Kehinde
©2018, Ayobami Temitope Kehinde